Becoming a Dad: Finding Your Place From the First Days

You waited in the maternity corridor, or held your wife's hand. And now this tiny three-kilo person is sleeping against her, and you wonder where to begin. The road to becoming a dad often starts with that feeling of being moved and a little off to the side at the same time. You will build your place by getting your hands busy from the very first days.

Here is what the law says about paternity leave in Morocco, the practical ways to care for baby, how to support mum, including with breastfeeding, and how to look after yourself.

Becoming a dad: a bond that is built

Love at first sight is not always instant, and that is fine. The Quebec fact sheet on fatherhood, aimed at perinatal professionals, reports that some fathers are surprised not to feel an instant bond after the birth, and that others do not know how to help with care or breastfeeding. Many also keep their worries to themselves, to protect their partner.

The bond is woven by looking after baby. Naître et grandir advises throwing yourself in from the start, even if you are not at ease: each small success strengthens your sense of competence, and the wish to continue. According to the Quebec fact sheet, fathers who take an active part in care from the first month gain confidence, which supports their involvement with the child at one year. Naître et grandir also advises mothers to value dad's good moments: criticism risks pushing him to withdraw.

Baby gains too. Naître et grandir cites studies in which children aged 2 to 5 with a present and engaged father have above-average intellectual development, and are said to show fewer signs of anxiety and depression. A father who responds quickly and consistently to crying builds a solid attachment.

Paternity leave in Morocco: what the law says

It is short, so it is worth using well. The rules, according to the site Démarches Maroc:

Three days go quickly, between the maternity unit, coming home and the paperwork. If you can, add annual leave days, to be negotiated with your employer, so you are there in the first weeks while mum recovers. These days also serve for formalities, such as the birth declaration, due within 30 days. The detail of both parents' rights is in our article on maternity and paternity leave in Morocco.

Skin-to-skin with dad, step by step

It is one of a father's finest gestures, and a useful one. Naître et grandir says its benefits are the same with the father as with the mother: steadier temperature, a calmer heart, much less crying. In one study, babies in skin-to-skin with their father stopped crying within 15 minutes. Fathers who do it tend to look after their baby more, talk to them more and have a better relationship with their partner. After a caesarean, when mum cannot do it, dad can take over.

The method, according to Naître et grandir:

1. Sit bare-chested and place baby, in a nappy, directly against your chest.
2. Their face always stays visible, nose and mouth clear, chin slightly raised.
3. Their head is turned to the side, the neck neither bent forward nor tipped back.
4. Their legs are tucked up, their back covered with a blanket.
5. If you feel yourself dozing off, lay them on their back in their cot, or hand them to an awake adult.

At home, the same guide suggests one to two hours of skin-to-skin a day until baby is 6 weeks old.

Nappies, bath, rocking: everyday gestures

Everything mum does, you can do, except breastfeed. Naître et grandir lists the gestures that count: changing nappies, rocking, talking, singing, taking baby out in the pushchair or carrier, giving a bath or a massage. A few pointers to get started:

• nappy changes: get everything ready first, and never let go of baby on the changing table; our article on changing baby's nappy step by step details the technique;
• bath and care: eyes, nose, nails, skin folds, water temperature, all in our advice on newborn washing;
• crying: rock, walk, speak softly; our guide to decoding baby's cries helps you understand what baby is asking;
• walks: in a baby carrier, baby against you, mum gets to rest.

From the shop

Gear that helps dad take over

Nothing essential, but enough to look after baby easily: an ergonomic baby carrier for walks, a stable bath, a changing station at a good height and a backpack changing bag that leaves your hands free.

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• −49 %LandArrow maternity changing bag, grey – Land228 DHinstead of 450 DHView product
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Products sold by La Maison du Bébé, publisher of this magazine. Prices as of 12 October 2026; please check the product page.

Nights: taking turns to hold out

Broken nights exhaust both parents. Naître et grandir advises taking turns: one gets up, fetches baby, changes and resettles them while the other sleeps. If baby is breastfed, bring them to mum for the feed and take care of the rest; milk expressed in advance also lets you give a feed on some nights. Baby sleeps on the back, in their own cot, close to you: the rules are in our article on safe sleep for baby.

Crying often increases from the second week, peaks around six weeks and eases around three or four months, reminds the INSPQ; some babies cry for more than three hours a day. If tiredness and frustration rise, put baby down in their cot, close the door and step away for a few minutes, checking on them every ten minutes. You never shake a baby: it can seriously injure them, even kill them.

Supporting mum, including with breastfeeding

Your role matters to her too. Naître et grandir notes that mothers supported by their partner are less stressed, less depressed, more patient and available with baby. Protect her rest: short visits, prepared meals, older children looked after.

For breastfeeding, your presence makes a difference: a father's presence and support encourage the mother to breastfeed, and to do so for longer, according to the same guide. Fathers interviewed by Quebec researcher Francine de Montigny say they struggle to find their place in decisions about feeding baby. Take it: read up together, for example with our article on getting breastfeeding off to a good start, help her get settled, massage, rock, comfort, and if a breast pump is needed, it is often dad who handles it.

And you, dad?

Tiredness, doubts and the feeling of being a bit in the way are common. They can go further: according to the Assurance Maladie, more than 10% of fathers have depressive symptoms in the two months after the birth, especially when their partner is depressed herself. Our article on baby blues and postnatal depression helps recognise the signs in either of you.

Talk about what you are going through with your wife, a friend, other fathers. Sharing tasks and the couple each have their own article: the mental load of mothers and life as a couple after baby.